Julie Bishop, Tony Abbott, Wyatt Roy and grandfather Philip Ruddock at Roy’s twelfth birthday party.
The member for Longman Wyatt Roy has reportedly been locked in his office for the past twenty seven hours and is refusing to come out. Sources close to Mr Roy say he will only leave on condition of Tony Abbott and Julie Bishop promising to stop fighting indefinitely.
In a short statement Ms Bishop told the press that she and Mr Abbott had assured Roy that whatever happened they would both continue to love him unconditionally but that as of yet Roy is still demonstrating no inclination to leave the room.
When questioned as to whether Ms Bishop or Mr Abbott would consider meeting Roy’s request that they promise to cease fighting indefinitely, Ms Bishop told the media
“I won’t do that because I don’t believe in lying to my children.” Sources close to the Prime Minister say he happily made the promise without hesitation.
Speaking to The (un) Australian, Christopher Pyne expressed his despair at Roy’s condition.
“I’m very worried about Wyatt. He’s always considered me something of a cool uncle, someone who he could talk to about things he couldn’t discuss with his parents. The fact that he won’t talk to me either is very disturbing.”
Queensland MP Andrew Laming whose office is adjacent to Roy’s confirmed that he had heard “Welcome To My Life” by Simple Plan playing on repeat for the last six hours.
Nathan Lentern
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