Daniel Andrews Pays Barista To Not Make A Coffee

dan andrews

Victoria’s Premier Daniel Andrews is at least $4.29 out of pocket after reaching a deal  with The Coffee Emporium to cancel his predecessors daily  order.

In what could be Victoria’s mostly costly cancelled coffee order ever, the premier revealed on Monday that  $3.39 of his personal salary (which is funded by the taxpayer) had already been irretrievably committed to the daily caffeine exchange and it was too late to cancel the first order.

In addition the Premier will pay 81 cents in wages to the member of his staff that spent approximately 1:47 seconds liaising with The Coffee Emporium to cancel the order.

Announcing the deal, Mr Andrews described it as “the best possible outcome from a situation that could have been avoided if the previous government had listened to the Victorian people and accepted that they didn’t want a coffee-drinking premier.”

He had acted “in the most responsible way possible”, the Premier said. “No compensation will be paid to The Coffee Emporium for lost future earnings. Absolutely none.”

The Victorian Opposition leader Matthew Guy slammed the decision as a “typical case of Labor wasting money.”

“Under Dennis Napthine, you would spend $3.39 and you would get a coffee. Under Labor, you still spend $3.39 and you poor a cup of coffee down the drain.”

Premier Andrews is confident that the wasted money will not affect his personal credit rating.

Nathan Lentern
https://twitter.com/nlentern1

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