Australia Emotionally Drained After Spending Long Day Hating Nick Kyrgios, Feeling Sorry For Nick Kyrgios, Hating Dawn Fraser, Feeling Sorry For Dawn Fraser Then Hating The People Who Hated Dawn Fraser.


Australia is in need of an aspirin and a good lie down after spending yesterday riding an emotional roller coaster of hate, re-evaluation and forgiveness.

“I started the day feeling vindicated for thinking that Nick Kyrgios was a bit of a prat then actually feeling sorry for the guy because of what I imagine Dawn Fraser must have said about him then really having it in for Dawn Fraser and her entire generation even though I kind of agree with 90% of what she said just not the whole go back where you came from part then I felt sad for Dawn because she is a champion and all that and is now being absolutely crucified for a poor choice of words and then I got angry about the haters taking her to task about being old and a bit mannish and then I had to have a good cry when I got home”, said a teary eyed country. “I think I need a hug.”

Having slept on it and put things in perspective, Australia is looking forward to a day of not getting collectively outraged about something and maybe paying some attention to its own home life.

Peter Green

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Categories: Sport

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