Peter Dutton Eggs Found In School Sandpit

Wildlife experts have identified the eggs found in a Laurieton school sandpit as belonging to a Peter Dutton and have removed them to a safe place for hatching.

“Peter Duttons slither in during the night and lay their eggs in cool, dry places,” said Jennifer Herpes, professor of reptile biology at the University of Port Macquarie. “We have moved the eggs to a secret offshore location for their own protection.”

“The school backs onto a big patch of native bushland and we often see Peter Duttons sunning themselves on a rock,” said school headmaster Jacko Clarke. “We warn the kiddies not to go chasing their balls if they go over the fence unless they’re wearing special Peter Dutton gaiters.”

Peter Dutton eggs are easily identified due to their round bulbous shape and remarkably thin skin.

“We will probably smash a few of the eggs in plain sight of the scrubland as a warning to other Peter Duttons considering laying a clutch on the premises,” said Mr Clarke. “After all, we decide who comes onto our school playground and the circumstances in which they do it.”

Peter Green

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Categories: Science

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1 reply

  1. I’ve just posted this on Facebook with a note saying that if anyone finds Peter Dutton eggs ( commonly known under the Latin term as POTATO HEAD eggs) please smash them as we don’t want any of his offspring around us.

    Sent from my iPad



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