Minister for the Dark Arts and wanna be Prime Minister Peter Dutton announced this morning that: “He had released an all-points bulletin to the AFP and his own private army Border Force to round up all these ‘Elf on the… Read More ›
Manus Island
Lambie Refuses To Say How Many Magic Beans The Government Gave Her To Repeal The Medevac Legislation
Independent (sic) Senator Jacqui Lambie has refused to disclose how many magic beans the Government gave her in exchange for her voting to repeal the Medevac legislation in the Senate. “Look, I will not disclose any detail about my negotiations… Read More ›
“I Won’t Be Making That Mistake Again” Vows Dutton As Australia Is Swamped By Boatloads Of Au Pairs
Peter Dutton has vowed to never again show any signs of humanity after his last slip up led to Australia being overrun by boatloads of empowered au pairs. “Our streets are infested with dreadlock haired German hippie girls taking babies… Read More ›
Morrison Regrets Listening To Cormann Over The Numbers For The Medevac Bill
Interim Prime Minister Scott Morrison has told colleagues of his frustrations with Senate leader Matthias Cormann after the Senator assured the PM that he was confident the Coalition had the numbers to defeat the Medevac bill in the house of… Read More ›
Christmas Crisis: Santa Transferred To Christmas Island For Processing
Days after his detention in Sydney for failing to clear customs, Santa Claus has been transferred to Christmas Island as the government processes his visa application and decides what to do with the iconic figure. The previously decommissioned site has… Read More ›
Santa Claus Detained By Australian Border Force
Merely days before Christmas, a Mr S Claus allegedly from the North Pole has been detained by Australian Border Force whilst trying to enter the country. It’s believed the patron of Christmas was identified by Customs Agents during immigration, his… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 