Channel 9 To Send Bill Lawry Off To ‘The Farm’ After Losing Cricket

Channel 9 has announced that due to it’s loss of the cricket broadcasting rights is will be forced to make some big calls on some of their stars. With the first one being that they wil be sending former Australian cricket Captain Bill Lawry off to the proverbial farm.

“It is sad that we have lost the cricket and even sadder that we have to send Bill away,” said a Channel 9 Spokesperson. “But don’t worry about Bill he is now free to run around in the fields with his friends Tony and Richie.”

When asked whether any of their talent would be released from contract to head over to Fox sports and Channel 7 the Spokesperson said: “We did enquire about trading some of our cricketers for their tennis commentators. However things went astray when Channel 7 executives were trapped in a lift with Mark Taylor and Ian Healy, since then all deals were off the table.”

Channel 7 has not yet announced their cricket commentary team however they have been spruiking roaming BT coming soon to the Australian dressing rooms.

Mark Williamson

You can check out our new show Decennium Horribilius at this year’s Sydney Comedy Festival. Hosted by The (un)Australian, the quiz show features teams of some of Sydney’s best comics trying to answer questions about the decade of the 1990s — with prizes for the audience.

Saturday May 5, 5.30pm. The Factory Theatre. Book tickets here.

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Categories: Sport

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