Canadian Bigot Shocked To Learn How Few People Actually Watch Sky News

Alt-right Canadian bigot Lauren Southern was shocked to learn how few people actually watched Sky News after appearing on the network over the weekend. Southern who is in Australia as part of her, “Look At Me Say Racist Crap’ world tour, appeared on the network in the hope of selling a few more tickets.

“I was shocked that so few people watched, normally when I appear on TV I get a few ticket sales or at least some angry tweets but this time nothing,” said Southern. “I will have to go with plan B and wear something controversial like a ‘Make Australia Great Again’ cap or a Collingwood football club jersey.”

When reached for comment over their low ratings a Sky News Spokesperson said: “When Lauren appeared on Rita Panahi’s show we had a record number of viewers, I mean we almost hit double figures.”

“It’s easy for people to dismiss Sky News over our low ratings but we are extremely vital to the discourse. I mean without us who would comedians make jokes about?”

Mark Williamson

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