The Australian Greens have today called for the immediate banning of the traditional Election day sausage sizzle, saying that it is highly insensitive to vegetarians and the phallic nature of the sausage is intimidatory towards female voters.
A spokesperson for the greens explained the call to ban the sausage to The (un)Australian saying: “For too long voters have been forced to endure children trying to foist a sausage on people as they line up to vote, the smell of burning dead animals is horrific and then you’re confronted with this giant phallic symbol, it’s too much I just want to vote damn it and aggressively push my Green party how to vote card on other voters..”
When we raised the issue of the election day sausage sizzle being a great way for schools and community groups to raise funds the spokesperson responded by saying: “They could sell tofu or salad or mung beans, it’s not all about meat you know a lot of my friends love mung beans.”
A spokesperson for Premier Gladys Berejiklian refused to be drawn into the debate without first checking with developers, whilst Opposition Leader Michael Daley asked us what Berejiklian was doing and said he’d consult the Unions and get back to us.
We didn’t dare raise the issue with the Shooters, Fishers and Fuckwits party as they’re armed, and crazy.