Desperate TV stations on Day 5 of their 24/7 Queen coverage have resorted to interviewing people named Elizabeth in a desperate attempt to fill time.
”There’s only so much time you can devote to stories about the corgis or what she did during the war,” said an unnamed TV programmer. ”So, heck, why not interview people named Elizabeth, way more interesting than listening to Downer waffle on about his high teas with her majesty.”
When asked why the need for constant coverage of the Monarch’s demise, the TVC executive said: ”We’ll everyone else is doing it, even Sky News.”
”If we switch back to our normal programming then we risk losing viewers.”
”Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go and try and workshop ideas, maybe we could do some stories on scones or jam making, the Queen liked jam and scones didn’t she?”
Mark Williamson
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