Author Archives

• PM Panics After Learning Cormann Did The Numbers For The Budget

  By theunozblog on 23/07/2020 • ( 0 )

  

  Australia’s part-time Prime Minister Scott Morrison is said to be panicked after learning that the numbers that Treasurer Josh Frydenburg will announce later today as part of his budget update were calculated by the Finance Minister Matthias Cormann. ”This is… Read More ›

• ScoMo Announces That Parliament Will No Longer Sit On Rainy Days

  By theunozblog on 22/07/2020 • ( 0 )

  

  Australia’s part-time Prime Minister Scott Morrison has announced that, in solidarity with the nation’s tradies, parliament will no longer sit on days with inclement weather. ”We’re all in this together, so I have made the decision that if it’s a… Read More ›

• “Zoom? What’s Zoom?” Says Bloke Who Cancelled Parliament

  By theunozblog on 20/07/2020 • ( 1 )

  

  Prime Minister Scott Morrison has reacted with befuddlement when asked if parliament could be run via Zoom. After spending two weekends watching footy and sinking beers, Morrison announced that they would suspend Parliament due to the threat of coronavirus. Whilst… Read More ›

• Dutton In Hiding After Learning Of Bill Gates’ Plan To Chip Humans

  By theunozblog on 20/07/2020 • ( 1 )

  

  Australia’s Minister for the dark arts Peter Dutton is reportedly in hiding after hearing the rumours surrounding Microsoft founder Bill Gates’ plan to chip human beings. “Peter is very nervous about potentially being chipped,” said a Spokesperson. “Normally the Minister… Read More ›

• Christensen Demands QLD Premier Open Up The State’s Borders To South East Asia

  By theunozblog on 17/07/2020 • ( 0 )

  

  The Morrison Government’s member for Manila George Christensen has demanded Queensland Premier Anastacia Palacaszcuk open up the State’s borders to South East Asia so that Queenslanders can get back to their normal everyday lives. “This Premier is on a power… Read More ›

• BREAKING: Dutton Reported Missing Federal Police Searching All Potato Processing Plants

  By theunozblog on 16/07/2020 • ( 0 )

  

  Minister for the dark arts Peter Dutton has been reported missing by the Nation’s media with the Federal Police called in to search all potato processing plants in the country. “We haven’t heard from Minister Dutton for a couple of… Read More ›