Minister for the Dark Arts Peter Dutton has declared that Border Force, of which he is in charge of is responsible for dealing with boats, not ships. Particularly not cruise ships ”A lot of people most notably the Twitterati have… Read More ›
Corona
Scientists Warn Kids To Scrub Their Easter Eggs Thoroughly With Soap And Water
With the impending arrival of Easter, scientists have warned children all around the world to ensure that they scrub their chocolate Easter eggs thoroughly with soap and water before they consume them. “The Easter Bunny is travelling all around the… Read More ›
Nation Wakes Up Wondering WTF Will Go Wrong Today
The Nation of Australia has woken up this morning and collectively wondered what the fuck will go wrong today, as the year 2020, which has thus far delivered bushfires, floods, George Pell, plagues and a world-wide pandemic rolls on. “Oh… Read More ›
Housebound Cats Overdosing On Schadenfreude Right Now
Reports are coming in that housebound cats across the nation are currently in full schadenfreude-mode as their human owners get to experience the torture they have inflicted on their felines. “Oh, you can’t go out to the pub for a… Read More ›
Scotty From Marketing Tells The Media That A Ship Is Not A Boat
Australian Prime Minister Scotty from marketing has used his daily press conference to berate the country’s media over their confusion between a ship and a boat. “In times like these the last thing we need is for the media to… Read More ›
Opinion: Covid-19 Threatens Our Wet Dreams
The other night I woke from a nightmare. In the nightmare I was home with Vicki and the kids, I turned to Vicki and told her that I was just going up to the pub for a nightcap. Vicki smiled… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 