The NSW State Government has announced that as well as shutting down shops for the day they will also be making it compulsory for all residents to spend ANZAC day at their local RSL gambling away at either a two… Read More ›
Premier
Gladys To Compensate All Optus Customers With A Free Pass To The Dubbo Gun Club
Optus’ reigning self-appointed employee of the month, Gladys Berejiklian, has promised all customers effected by the nation-wide outage that they would be compensated with a free pass to the Dubbo Gun Club. ”I know that our customers have been inconvenienced,… Read More ›
Credlin Thanks Andrews After His Resignation Gave Her The Greatest Orgasm Of Her Life
Low rating Sky News host, Peta Credlin, has sent former Victorian Premier Dan Andrews a thank you note after his resignation led her to achieve the greatest orgasm of her life. ”I’m not actually a smoker but after that I… Read More ›
NSW Premier Tells Public To Just Take A Government Limo To Work
Interim NSW Premier Dominick Perrotet has told the public to simply take a Government limo today as the city is ground to a halt due to ongoing train strikes. ”To the people of NSW I say don’t let the Unions… Read More ›
Barilaro Offers Compromise By Proposing To Send Koalas On An All Expenses Paid Cruise On The Ruby Princess
NSW deputy Premier (for now) John Barilaro has offered to compromise on his threat to blow up the Government, by proposing that all koalas in the state are sent on an all expenses paid cruise on the Ruby Princess. ”Look,… Read More ›
Tasmanian Premier Quits Politics To Spend More Time With His Other Head
Tasmanian Premier Will Hodgman has resigned saying he wants to spend more time getting to know his other head. “Politics is hard work and I’ve found that I’ve drifted apart from my other head over the past five years,” said… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 