Opposition leader the Dark Lord Peter Dutton has told Australian’s to slip a pineapple into their next gas bill as a way to say thank you to the countries gas producers. ”This country owes a debt of gratitude to our… Read More ›
Puppies
Dutton Sends Bandt A Basket Of Dead Puppies To Say Thanks For Covering As Opposition Leader
Holidaying Opposition leader the Dark Lord Peter Dutton has sent Greens leader Adam Bandt a gift basket of dead puppies as a thank you after the Greens leader stepped in as Opposition leader over the past week. ”It’s always nice… Read More ›
Dutton Sends Colleagues Holiday Snaps Of Him Shooting A Puppy
Opposition leader the Dark Lord Peter Dutton who is currently holidaying in America has sent his colleagues video footage of him shooting a puppy. ”America is a great place and full of opportunity,” said the Dark Lord. ”Previously I have… Read More ›
Dutton Defends Using Go Fund Me Cash To Buy Puppies For Strangling
Australia’s Minister for the Dark Arts Peter Dutton has defended his decision to use funds raised for Queensland flood relief to purchase puppies to strangle. ”My role is very stressful and I’m sure that the people in my electorate want… Read More ›
Nation’s Boofheads Demand Albo Apologise For Linking Them To Dutton
Australia’s Boofheads have come out today to demand that the nation’s Opposition Leader Anthony Albanese apologise for linking them with Australia’s Minister for the Dark Arts Peter Dutton. ”We boofheads are pretty easy going blokes you know,” said a spokesperson… Read More ›
Dutton Replaces Strangling Puppies With Meditation
Minister for the Dark Arts Peter Dutton has told reporters how he has replaced his old hobby of strangling puppies with a new hobby of meditating. “The old Peter would come home after a day of failed leadership attempts and… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 