Organisers of this year’s Australian Open have warned spectators not to needle anti-vac competitor Novak Djokovic when he is on court. ”Look, people need to respect Novak and his beliefs,” said a Spokesperson for the event. ”He is a champion… Read More ›
Vaccination
PM Says The Un-Vacc’d Should Be Able To Grab A Coffee, Make A Noose & Vote For Him
Australia’s Prime Minister Scotty from marketing has today called upon those in charge of the country to allow greater freedoms for the un-vaccinated. The PM wants the un-vaccinated to be able to grab a coffee, rig up a noose and… Read More ›
ScoMo’s Creepy Mate Off To The Philippines To Give Out Jabs
The Prime Minister’s creepy mate the Member for Dawson is planning to head to the Philippines to jab as many young ladies as he can manage. ”The Member for Dawson is very focused on the health and safety of the… Read More ›
Gladys Prioritises Vaccines For Problem Gamblers
NSW Premier and Australia’s ruby standard when it comes to handling the Covid crisis Gladys Berejiklian has demanded that problem gamblers be prioritised for vaccination ASAP. ”We need to get the State up and running and to do that we… Read More ›
Joyce Offers His Prick To Help Out With The Vaccination Campaign
Aspiring Minister for Home Affairs Barnaby Joyce has offered to help kickstart Australia’s struggling vaccination program by donating his prick. ”I am if anything a man of the people, so ladies of Australia line up to get my prick,” said… Read More ›
Barnaby Joyce To Be The Face Of New Vaccination Campaign: Just A Prick
Aspiring Minister for Home Affairs Barnaby Joyce has been announced as the face of the Government’s new vaccination campaign: “Just A Prick!” ”There were many contenders in Cabinet to be the face of the campaign,” said a Government Insider. ”I… Read More ›