Stupid People Not Responding To Being Called Stupid

Stupid People

There are concerns that a widespread community campaign to cure stupid people by calling them stupid is not working.

There are concerns that a widespread community campaign to cure stupid people by calling them stupid is not working.

“We’ve seen a marked rise in stupidity in recent years,” said Professor Julia Wyse, an expert in stupidity. “Despite an enhanced social media campaign by smart people donating their time to telling stupid people about their stupidity, it still seems to be flourishing regardless.”

Research by the professor is indicating that many stupid people appear to disengage after being referred to as morons, idiots, bigots, wankers or from another planet.

“No matter how many graphs and articles from The Guardian and The Huffington Post we shared on these people’s newsfeeds, there didn’t seem to by any change in their stupidity levels. In fact most of them went up.”

Similar to the cane toad with cane beetles, it was hoped that by introducing smugness into the community, leaders would be able to help cut down the rates of stupidity. Instead, it’s now presented the community with two problems.

“Now we almost have as many pious people as we do stupid people and it’s driving the rest of us on Facebook insane,” said the professor.

In a bid to stamp out stupidity, it appears that smart people have developed an addiction to the sound of their own updates. The professor said there has been a huge rise in Smugiosis, a condition afflicting smart people who continually attempt to convert the stupid to enlightenment via social media.

“Smugiosis seems to be rising at similar rates to stupidity,” said the Professor. “For instance, I do believe this article may be smug.”

The professor has been noticing the trend for sometime and believes that most people don’t even realise they have the condition.

“I had one lawyer client posting up to 50 articles per day on the perils of the anti-vax movement,” said the professor. “I’ve since put him on patches. He’s down to 20 now.”

Smugiosis generally results in the sufferer posting many updates and articles on immigration, vaccination, climate change and vintage Scandinavian furniture. “This then leads to stupid people burning effigies of all of these,” said the professor. “The remainder of social media participants are left confused and anxious as to whether they are stupid or smug with many having concerns that their smart friends may have too many stupid friends and thereby be stupid themselves. “

Some experts are suggesting that Smugiosis may even be a form of stupidity itself. “I very much doubt it,” said the professor. “We’re much too smart for that.”

*The writer denies any smugness in the writing of this article

John Cahill

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