The government have been making more and more frequent references to extreme weather events localised to delicate crockery. These so-called storms in teacups are, according to the government, in no way related to climate change which totally doesn’t exist.
Environment Minister Greg Hunt told The (un)Australian: “The increasing frequency of the teacup storms are clearly a result of Canberra insider barometric pressure and not any sort global weather phenomenon. If you ask me the whole thing is just a tsunami in a coffee pot.”
Asked if the government was planning on changing its position on climate change or renewable energy targets in the near future, Hunt replied: “Climate change is just a storm in a teacup, but we are considering a National Crockery Insurance Scheme or NCIS.”
According to Hunt other notable teacup storms of recent times include:
- Leadership spill speculation teacup storm
- Deaths in detention teacup storm
- Queensland election teacup storm
- Cyclone Marcia.
The (un)Australian approached the bureau of meteorology for comment, but they’re scientists who make stuff up to create taxes so we didn’t try very hard.