Authorities Ready To Move Against Oregon Militia ‘The Second They Convert to Islam’

Ranching Standoff Protest

Denying they were not taking the seizure of a government building by 150 heavily armed militiamen in Oregon seriously, US authorities said today they were developing detailed plans for the decisive use of force against the Oregon occupiers “the very second it is confirmed they have converted to Islam”.

After a protest over the jailing of two ranchers for arson ended with an armed right-wing anti-government group seizing the Malheur wildlife refuge in Oregon on January 2, authorities announced they would take no immediate action. However, the FBI was quick to tell media this was not a sign they under-estimated the threat.

An FBI spokesperson told The (un)Australian: “Look, we monitor our citizens tweets pretty closely, so we know there’s been a lot of ‘chatter’ claiming we are not taking this armed attack on a federal building seriously simply because the perpetrators are white.

“This is just not true. We are very well aware of the threat posed by anyone, of any colour, who uses violent means to push a political agenda and is Muslim. We can assure the US people we are watching the occupation closely for any telltale signs of terrorist activity, such as evidence that Korans were being smuggling into the building or that the occupiers have begun building a mosque.”

The spokesperson said other triggers to the authorities to move on the armed insurgents included any evidence that their well-stocked armoury included a toy gun of the sort 12-year-Tamir Rice was holding when shot dead by Ohio police in 2014.

Carlo Sands

You can follow The (un)Australian on twitter or like us on facebook.

Categories: World

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1 reply

  1. Are you actually saying the FBI shold militarily storm the compound? I get the point about double-standards, but why adovcate the state use brute force, is that really the best solution here?


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