There have been calls for tighter security at parliament house in Canberra after a loud, ill disciplined mob known as “The Senate” briefly took over the running of the country.
“I’ve never seen a bigger bunch of freaks, hillbillies and no hopers in my life,” said visiting school student Amy Jeffries as she observed the workings of the Senate from the public gallery. “My ears are still ringing from the screeching of that shrill red headed lady, and what’s that creepy old guy with the beard doing there? I’m very disappointed because we came on this excursion expecting to see the sensible, level headed people who run the country doing their job, but I guess they were hiding somewhere in terror from this pack of boofheads.”
After security turfed out the hordes of unwashed riffraff from the chamber, they sheepishly had to re-admit them after discovering they were meant to be there.
“The houses of government are no place for young folk who’ve never held a proper job and can’t shut up,” said Senator Sam Dastyari after being tossed into an alley way by the parliament house bouncer. “I’m off to the hardware store to buy some superglue to stick my bottom to my seat to make sure I never have to leave this place again.”