The other brother of Kim Jong Un has eagerly offered the North Korean supreme leader the coveted top bunk in the bedroom they share following the mysterious death of their other brother at a Malaysian airport.
“Jong Un has always been good at getting his own way and if he wants the top bunk who am I to stand in his way,” said his slightly terrified other brother Kim Song Un. “And if he wants to borrow my cool new shirt to wear on Saturday night that’s good too. He can be the cops next time we play cops and robbers, it’s no biggy.”
Long time DPRK watchers have speculated that Kim Jong Un has always been unhappy having to sleep in the racing car bed while his big brothers have occupied the bunk.
Kim Jong Un’s brother Kim Jong Nam was allegedly killed at Kuala Lumpur international airport by a female assassin who whispered the words “this is for always getting the biggest serve of ice cream at dessert” in his ear as she placed a poison soaked rag over his mouth.
“I’m saddened by the death of my half brother and hope my other brother doesn’t suffer the same fate,” said Kim Jong Un from his office at the top of the big pointy skyscraper in Pyongyang. “Perhaps he will think twice before borrowing my skateboard without asking.”