The High Court has thrown Malcolm Robert’s defence of his eligibility to sit in the senate into disarray after insisting that he produce some “evidence” to back up his belief that he was not a dual citizen at the time of his election.
“If I reckon something is true that’s good enough for me but apparently that’s not good enough for the hoity toity elites from the High Court”, said the One Nation senator. “I suppose next they’ll be saying that if a vast majority of the High Court thinks I’m guilty then that means I’ve lost the case, which is a whole lot of unmathematical mumbo jumbo.”
Onlookers report that Roberts spent the day on his smart phone looking up the meaning of “evidence” on the online dictionary and then repeatedly pressing the little icon with the speaker on it that makes the app speak the word out loud.
“Ev… urgh… dunce… ever… dense… every… idiot… ah, it’s no good, I’ll never be able to pronounce these fancy pants legal terms,” said an exasperated Roberts. “I’ll have a bit of a chat with my old mate Rod Culleton about it. He seems familiar with how the judiciary works.”
The High Court adjourned the case to allow the leader of the court enough time to drive around Chicago in the Bluesmobile getting the rest of the High Court back together.