State-run schools in NSW and Queensland have announced that they will close their doors next week ahead of NRL “Mad Monday” celebrations.
The first Monday after the regular season is often a day “hijinks” for the players of teams eliminated from finals contention. Due to the NRL’s “School Education Program” they deployed earlier this year, the state government decided it best to avoid any interaction with players.
“Yeah, the last thing 2020 needs is another NRL player adding their spin on extra-curricular activities,” stated one Education spokesperson. “Weren’t they all meant to be locked on an island somewhere?”
The news has made many parents with school aged students reminisce about the times when NRL players spent their free time pissing into their own mouths.
RSPCA and Dog shelters in the two states have also decided to close for business for the start of the week, stating the NRL players “have a reputation.”
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