Fixated Persons Unit Investigate Sky News Over Meghan Markle

The Fixated Persons Unit has announced that they will be investigating niche news network Sky News Australia over the stations ongoing obsession with Meghan Markle.

”We understand that Meghan is in the public eye so news stories about her are inevitable,” said a Spokesperson for the Fixated Persons Unit. ”However, to turn the Queen’s death into ongoing stories about her grieving Grandson’s wife is pretty sick to be honest.”

”Thankfully the network is quite low rating so their coverage doesn’t offend too many people.”

When reached for comment on why they were harassing Prince Harry and his Wife, a Spokesperson for Sky News Australia said: ”Gotta harass someone.”

”Let’s face it there’s 24 hours in a day to fill and we can’t fill it all with corgi coverage.”

”Now, if you’ll excuse me, Rowan Dean has an idea that involves a Meghan Markle cut out and 15 kilograms of marmalade.”

Mark Williamson

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