National Gallery Replaces Blue Poles With Square Of RSL Club Carpet

Las Vegas Carpets

The National Gallery of Australia has announced that it will be selling the iconic Jackson Pollock artwork “Blue Poles” and replacing it with a square of carpet from the floor of the Wagga Wagga RSL Club.

“The square of carpet is a wonderful and rare example of the ‘action painting’ genre pioneered by Pollock,” said head curator Vivienne Easel. “Just like Pollock’s best work it incorporates an eclectic mixture of paint, phlegm, blood, vomit, beer and various unidentifiable bodily fluids.”

“The acquisition of ‘Red Swirls’, or to give it its proper title ‘Carpet Court 2007 Stain Resistant No. 11’, is a major coup for the Australian art community,” said art critic Robert Hughes. “These works only come onto the market when pokie revenues are lucrative enough to justify a major renovation of the VIP Lounge and function rooms of the local Rissole.”

The purchase of “Blue Poles” for $1.3 million by Gough Whitlam was a source of great controversy in 1973, but the National Gallery expects it to fetch more than $500 million when they sell it at a garage sale later this month.

“We were about to roll it up and take it to the tip when this bloke dressed all in black and wearing a beret offered to take the carpet off our hands,” said Maurie Simpson, president of the Wagga Wagga RSL Club. “When we said he could have the lot for five bucks he was overjoyed.”

A square of carpet from the floor of the Cootamundra United Services Club was recently sold to the Metropolitan Museum of Modern Art in New York for $170 million.

Peter Green

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