Author Archives
-
Prospective One Nation MP Asks Current MPs Not To Use Up All The Crazy
The One Nation Party candidate hoping to fill Rod Culleton’s senate position should his election be found invalid has put out a desperate plea to the remaining members of the party not to hog all the looniness before he has… Read More ›
-
Nation’s Newsreaders Bitterly Divided Over Who Will Win Melbourne Cup
Australia’s newsreaders will head into Tuesday’s Melbourne Cup with wildly diverging predictions about who will win the nation’s most famous horse race. “I always hold back placing my bet until I’ve heard what the breakfast show hosts and the trusted… Read More ›
-
Census Fail Leaves Australia With No Clue Of Jedi Population
The Australian Bureau of Statistics has admitted that the debacle over the 2016 Census has left frustrated infrastructure planners with no idea how many Jedi Knights there are in the country. “Census data is vital in determining how the nation’s… Read More ›
-
Reptillians Despair At Not Finding Better Candidate Than Hillary Clinton
The Reptillians have admitted that for a shadowy organisation that controls the world it could have selected a much better candidate for President than Hillary Clinton. “With the entire resources of the United Nations at our disposal and the ability… Read More ›
-
Government Introduces Draft For The Culture War
The Coalition has brought back conscription to fight against the forces of the ABC, Fairfax and the Guardian in the Culture War. “We simply haven’t got enough enlisted cultural warriors to write derangedly psychopathic opinion pieces in the Herald Sun,”… Read More ›
-
Trump Told To Stare Straight Ahead And Think About The Rabbits
Donald Trump’s campaign manager has asked him to look away from her and think about the rabbit farm they’re going to start once the election is over. “Guys like us that want to make America great again, we’re the loneliest… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 