Author Archives
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Nine Malaysians Arrested For Not Streaking At Cricket
Nine Malaysian nationals are facing long jail terms after refusing to strip down and streak at a Matador Cup cricket match last night in Perth. “I turned around and was absolutely shocked to see a big bunch of blokes in… Read More ›
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Comminsure Policy Document Wins Nobel Prize For Literature
The Swedish Academy has awarded the writer of Comminsure’s Life Care Cover policy document the 2016 Nobel Prize for literature citing “great swathes of fanciful invention and imaginative wordplay”. “The work transports the reader into a beautifully constructed fantasy land… Read More ›
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Kim And Kanye’s Egos Stolen In Terrifying Robbery
Masked gunmen have made off with $14 million worth of ego after holding up Kim Kardashian in her luxury hotel room Paris. “I’ve just realised that all I am is some guy who pinches other people’s riffs and turns them… Read More ›
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Thousands Of Sharks And Dogs Fans Gather To Get A Glimpse Of Really Pissed Footballers
Fans of underdog football champions the Western Bulldogs and the Cronulla Sharks have swarmed the home grounds of both clubs hoping to get a look at what a group of spectacularly pissed grand final winners look like in person. “I’ve… Read More ›
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Wyatt Roy Spends Gap Year Backpacking Through Iraq
Ex MP Wyatt Roy has been criticised by his former colleagues for spending his gap year backpacking through Iraq. “I’ve already got myself a bit of work picking dates on a date farm and with Iraq not having a backpacker… Read More ›
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South Australian Premier At Victorian Border Wanting To Buy 10 Million Size D Batteries
Counter staff at an all night service station in Kaniva were startled last night when Jay Weatherill pulled up in a ute and offered to purchase the entire stock of size D batteries. “He cleaned us out of torch batteries… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 