Author Archives
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Cabinet To All Pitch In And Buy Matthias ‘Numbers Man’ Cormann A Calculator For Christmas
With the end of the parliamentary year in sight Scott Morrison’s cabinet have done a whip around with everybody chipping in to buy Senate Leader Matthias ‘Numbers Man’ Cormann a calculator for Christmas. “In an ideal world we would have… Read More ›
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Frydenburg Promises To Flog Westpac With The Warmest Of Lettuce
Treasurer Josh Frydenburg has told colleagues of his plans to punish rogue bank Westpac by flogging the bank and it’s executives with the warmest lettuce he can find. “Josh is very upset at Westpac right now,” said a Government Insider…. Read More ›
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Australian Farmers Urged To Give Generously To Struggling Banking Executives
Australia’s farmers currently dealing with bush fires and drought have been urged to put their hands in their pockets to give what they can to Australia’s struggling banking executives. “Our poor banking executives are really doing it tough,” said an… Read More ›
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ScoMo Plans On Getting Fit By Hitting The Thoughts And Prayers Hard
Prime Minister Scott Morrison has told his inner circle that he plans to improve his fitness after he struggled on a hike over the weekend and he will be doing so with an extensive regime of ‘thoughts and prayers.’ “The… Read More ›
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Prime Minister ScoMo Appoints Australian Cricket Team Special Envoys To The Bush Fires
Australian Prime Minister Scott Morrison has today announced that he has appointed the Australian cricket team as ‘Special Envoys to the Bush Fires’ in a move that he hopes will help reinvigorate struggling towns dealing with bush fires and drought…. Read More ›
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Bernardi Struggling To Find A Venue Big Enough For Himself And His Ego’s Farewell To Parliament Celebration
Failed Senator Cory Bernardi has told the press of his struggles to find a venue in his home State of South Australia big enough to host a farewell dinner for both himself and his ego. “I am really struggling, you… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 