News Corp Australia has signed Cardinal Pell as their new columnist in the hope that the Cardinal can reach out and touch the youth of the Nation. ”As the audience ages News Corp need to reach a younger demographic,” said… Read More ›
Media
Peta Credlin’s Viewers, All 3 Of Them Want Her In Parliament
Sky News Australia’s third highest rating presenter Peta Credlin has been buoyed today after her viewers, all 3 of them urged her to down tools and run for Parliament. With news that former PM Scott Morrison may be looking to… Read More ›
Sky News To Run A Telethon To Raise Funds For Cardinal Pell
Niche news network Sky News Australia has announced plans to hold a telethon to raise funds for Cardinal Pell’s upcoming legal battles. They’ve asked their viewers, all 6 of them, to please give generously. ”The Cardinal has touched so many,”… Read More ›
Tearful Baristas Admit It’s Been International Roast™ All Along
All coffee served in Australia’s hipster cafes has been International Roast™ the whole time, confessed the nations baristas in a tear soaked press conference yesterday. “The Belizian Misty Mountain, the Los Pelotas Kilimanjaro Cascara, even the one that allegedly has… Read More ›
Entire Nation Trying Not To Picture Rupert Murdoch And Jerry Hall Doing It
Australia’s 23 million people have spent the past few days trying to get the image of Rupert Murdoch and Jerry Hall’s wedding night out of their head. “I’m trying to think of nice things like a beautiful lake with ducks… Read More ›
Press Disappointed After Albo Leaves Dutton Out Of His Cabinet
Australia’s media pack has reacted angrily to news that new Prime Minister Anthony Albanese failed to find a spot in his cabinet for Opposition leader Peter Dutton. ”This is just a ridiculous move by Albo,” said an anonymous Journalist. ”Lord… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 