Greg Hunt has assured the United Nations that Australia’s dodo population are thriving and there is no need to place them on a list of endangered species. “Everything’s fine down here, we’ve got dodos up the wazoo,” said the Minister… Read More ›
News
Amber Heard Files for Divorce From Johnny Depp After Finally Watching His Last Half Dozen Films
Amber Heard has announced she is filing for divorce from actor Johnny Depp, citing “irreconcilable differences” after finally watching the Hollywood star’s past half dozen films. A shaken Heard, who married Depp last year, told The (un)Australian: “As a working… Read More ›
Australians Favour Live Export Of Barnaby Joyce To Indonesia
A new poll shows over 99% of Australians are in favour of exporting Barnaby Joyce live to Indonesia. “I’d be willing to go down to the docks and help load him onto the boat in person,” said New England voter… Read More ›
Campbell’s Release Barnaby Joyce Flavoured Inbred Tomato Soup
Campbell’s Soup company has released a new line of Barnaby Joyce-flavoured inbred tomato soup in time for winter. “We’re delighted that Johnny Depp has come on-board to help promote our new variety of slightly thick vegetable extract,” said Campbell’s head… Read More ›
Giggling Mike Baird Approves Use Of Medical Marijuana
Mike Baird seemed to be in high spirits as he stumbled out of the basement of parliament house brushing the air frantically around him with both hands to announce that a trial of medical cannabis will be starting in NSW…. Read More ›
Angry Anderson Not Wishing He Was A Tribesman In The Hills Of Afghanistan As Often As He Used To
Angry Anderson, senate candidate for the Australian Liberty Party, has admitted that he spends far less time wishing he was a tribesman in the hills of Afghanistan than he used to back in the 1980s. “I’ve got to admit I… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 