Medical authorities are treating with caution new scientific studies showing that electronic heroin syringes are 95% less dangerous than regular pointy metal syringes. “This would be wonderful news for smackies who want to get wasted in venues that have traditionally… Read More ›
News
Secret ACTU Army Training At Dubai To Take On Abbott
An ACTU-backed grassroots army is secretly training in Dubai, vowing to defeat the government and consign Prime Minister Tony Abbott to political history, The (un)Australian can exclusively reveal. The unprecedented, top-secret campaign involves rank-and-file activists training with active members of… Read More ›
Police Say Neighbourly Love Will Stop Drug Epidemic
Police across the nation are taking up the Prime Minister’s baton to promote an initiative to combat illicit drug use which they say has got out of control as unemployment has climbed and boredom has set in across the suburbs… Read More ›
Mark Latham Calls For Trolling To Be Taught In Schools
Former Opposition Leader and the only man that the taxi industry has recommended try using Uber, Mark Latham, has called for schools to add trolling to the curriculum. The move comes as Latham “resigned” yesterday as a columnist from The… Read More ›
Monster Shark Dies While Resisting Arrest
Fisheries have said that a huge shark caught of northern New South Wales this week died as a result of a struggle when being taken into custody. “We just wanted to talk to him about an incident in the area”,… Read More ›
Infographics Outlawed By Government
Canberra has declared that from next Monday all federal government departments must cease using infographics in reports and other communications. The directive came from the Minister for Communications, Malcolm Turnbull and is believed to be part of the government’s wider… Read More ›