Australia’s Minister for the Dark Arts Peter Dutton has been telling colleagues that if they give him the Prime Ministership he will not wash anyone’s hair, however, he will not promise to stop strangling people’s puppies. ”The Dark Lord has… Read More ›
Politics
PM Tells Gladys That She’s Not His Friend Anymore
Australian Prime Minister (for now) little Scotty Morrison has popped his head up from his tree fort to declare that Gladys Berejiklian is not his friend anymore. ”Gladys Bere-what’s her-name is not my friend and she can just go away,”… Read More ›
Barnaby Denies Hoarding Wives Claims There Is A Supply Issue
Australia’s deputy Prime Minister And aspiring Minister for Home Affairs Barnaby Joyce has denied claims that he is hoarding wives and instead has claimed that there is a supply issue causing all the problems. ”It’s very easy for people to… Read More ›
Desperate ScoMo Considering Knighthood For Disgraced Prince Andrew
Prime Minister Scotty from marketing has been sounding out his colleagues over potentially knighting the recently demoted Prince Andrew. ”Scott, err, ScoMo is desperate for something to distract the public from all his recent failures,” said a Government Insider. ”He… Read More ›
Barnaby Tells ScoMo That He Won’t Take Christensen To ‘The Farm’
Aspiring Minister for Home Affairs Barnaby Joyce has told the PM that he won’t under any circumstances take his good mate George Christensen out to ‘the Farm’ no matter what the Member for Dawson says. ”George is my mate and… Read More ›
Man Who Believed Sanctity Of Marriage Threatened By Marriage Equality Set To Have A Crack At His 2nd Marriage
Barnaby Joyce a prominent opponent of marriage equality, as he believed it threatened the sanctity of marriage has announced he has proposed to the woman who he left his first wife for and she has said yes. ”Everyone loves a… Read More ›