A sad Shire magpie who simply wants a friend is unable to comprehend why everyone he swoops down on to give a hug to runs away in terror. “I’m so alone all day on top of this telegraph pole and… Read More ›
Science
Roberts Accuses NASA Of Travelling Back In Time To Make Him British
Senator (for now) Malcolm Roberts has blamed his citizenship woes on US space agency NASA and the Twitterati. Claiming NASA somehow traveled back in time to make him a British citizen. The One Nation Senator agreed to talk to The… Read More ›
Murray Darling Cotton Inquiry Will Be Breathable and Non Allergenic
The NSW government has promised that an inquiry into the use of water by the cotton industry will be strong and comfortable and not a whitewash. “We will be hand whitewashing the inquiry first before its first proper whitewash to… Read More ›
Australian Space Agency To Send Manned Holden Kingswood To Dubbo By 2035
Australia will be getting its very own space agency with plans to mount a mission to put astronauts on the surface of Dubbo within two decades. “Due to the high cost of petrol and the dodgy radiator we will have… Read More ›
Elon Musk To Build World’s Largest Bottom Drawer To House World’s Largest Battery
South Australia will be constructing the world’s biggest bottom kitchen drawer in which to keep spares of the world’s biggest lithium ion battery, which the inventor has promised to build within 100 days. “No-one has ever attempted to build such… Read More ›
Spotty McSpotfaces Hit Hard By Cadburys Cyber Attack
Australia’s Spotty McSpotfaces are in a state of outrage and thousands of oompah loompahs are out of work after an attack by the Petya ransomware virus caused the Cadburys chocolate factory in Hobart to stop its production line. “My bathroom… Read More ›
