Interim Prime Minister Scott Morrison has promised to throw the book at rogue MP Julia Banks following the damning release of the Royal Commission’s report into Banks and the finance industry. “I’ve read the report and I think we can… Read More ›
banks
Turnbull Shocked That Royal Commission Investigating Banks Not Banksy
The Prime Minister has expressed concern and annoyance that the Royal Commission that his Government set up is investigating Banks rather than his planned target the artist Banksy. “This is a most concerning occurrence,” said the Prime Minister. “I mean… Read More ›
Turnbull Pledges To Flog Banking Execs With The Warmest Lettuce Available
Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull has expressed his anger at the behaviour of banking executives uncovered by the Royal Commission and promised to deliver harsh punishment to all involved by flogging them with the warmest of lettuce. “I am most upset… Read More ›
Dead Commbank Customer Makes Fortune In The Afterlife
A deceased Commonwealth Bank customer has told the banking royal commission he’s made millions of dollars in the afterlife by following the advice of his financial planner from beyond the grave. “Since I arrived in Heaven I’ve built up an… Read More ›
Crime Gangs Outraged By CBA’s High Money Laundering Fees
International drug smuggling gangs have joined the call for a royal commission into the banking sector after being forced to pay the Commonwealth Bank outrageously high fees for each money laundering transaction. “It sucks that they charge us $1.50 each… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 