The federal government announced last night that young people who lose their jobs will only be forced into prostitution for four weeks before they are eligible for unemployment benefits, instead of six months as expected. Speaking off the record, spokesperson for the treasurer,… Read More ›
budget
Labor Caucus In Disarray Over Release Of Actual Policy
With the country gripped by unprecedented excitement over Treasurer Joe Hockey’s second budget, evidence has emerged that Labor’s recent, uncharacteristic announcement of detailed policy was an error that has sown discord within the party leadership. When shadow treasurer Chris Bowen… Read More ›
The (un)Australian’s Guide To How The 2015 Budget Will Affect Your Ugly Family
Everyone knows the budget is the most important federal document to ever be entrusted in Joe Hockey’s meaty paw. Class warfare is a zero sum game and the budget determines whether you arm yourself for revolution or tell a bunch… Read More ›
Breaking: Joe Hockey Spends Budget Savings On Magic Beans
A cabinet leak from today’s federal budget has revealed that Treasurer Joe Hockey has already invested seven billion dollars worth of projected budget savings on six magic beans that he got from an old man* that he met while walking to the… Read More ›
Economic Downturn Causes Rise In Beach Homelessness
The latest economic data has highlighted that middle Australia is doing it tougher than ever before. New figures have shown that in the wake of tanking commodity prices, thousands of Australians are in danger of having to sell their beach homes…. Read More ›
Budget Leak: Immigration Detainees To Pay Own Way
Plans to introduce a policy whereby illegal boat arrivals must pay for the cost of their own detention has been leaked a few weeks away from announcing the federal budget for 2015-16. The leaked budget documents indicate that under the… Read More ›