The Australian Prime Minister Scotty from marketing has announced that the traditional Budget lock-up, a process whereby journalists are locked in a room to run the rule over the budget will be moved from Parliament house to Engadine Maccas. ”We… Read More ›
budget
Budget Turmoil After Cormann Revealed To Have Been The One To Crunch The Numbers
The Australian Government is in turmoil today as it learned that the budget, due to be released tomorrow was in fact calculated by noted ‘numbers man’ Finance Minister Mathias Cormann. ”This is an absolute disaster, who knows how far out… Read More ›
ScoMo Sees Nothing Wrong With Tradies Being Able To Take Arts Workers Lunch Money
Prime Minister Scotty from marketing has told reporters that he sees nothing wrong with tradies being able to legally demand an arts worker hand over their lunch money. “Arts workers need to realise that they need to be a part… Read More ›
Josh Frydenburg Caught Trying To Commune With Thatcher
Treasurer Josh Frydenberg was spotted sneaking into his home study last night, carrying what looked suspiciously like a Ouija board under his arm before locking the door, a source close to the Morrison government’s “numbers man” told The (un)Australian. The… Read More ›
PM Panics After Learning Cormann Did The Numbers For The Budget
Australia’s part-time Prime Minister Scott Morrison is said to be panicked after learning that the numbers that Treasurer Josh Frydenburg will announce later today as part of his budget update were calculated by the Finance Minister Matthias Cormann. ”This is… Read More ›
ScoMo Gets A Laugh In The Party Room By Asking Cormann To Do Some Basic Maths
Prime Minister Scott Morrison has lifted spirits in the Coalition party room by pulling out his favourite party trick of asking the Finance Minister Matthias Cormann to do some basic maths. ”Scotty really knows how to keep spirits high,” said… Read More ›