Former Minister for Women Tony Abbott has told PM Scott Morrison that he will happily shirtfront the former PM Malcolm Turnbull in exchange for a Knighthood. ”People who know me know that I’m not afraid to shirtfront every now and… Read More ›
climate change
Barnaby: Nationals Agree To Net Zero Extra-Marital Affairs By 2050
Australia’s new Deputy Prime Minister and soon-to-be appointed Minister for Home Affairs has committed his party to net zero extra-marital affairs by the year 2050. ”Our children’s future is dependent on us getting this right,” said the Deputy PM. ”By… Read More ›
Abbott Plans To Lead The Anzac Day March After Fighting In The Culture Wars
Former Australian Prime Minister and newly appointed IPA coffee boy Tony Abbott has told his friends and colleagues that he plans to lead this year’s Anzac Day March, in acknowledgement of his frequent participation in culture wars. ”I have always… Read More ›
Roberts Demands Royal Commission Into Whether Or Not The Fridge Light Stays On When The Door Is Closed
One Nation’s leading mind (sic) Malcolm Roberts has today demanded the Government immediately hold a Royal Commission into whether or not the fridge light stays on when the door is closed. “It’s time this Government focused on issues that matter… Read More ›
Scotty From Marketing Pledges To Start Fracking Engadine Maccas
Following his address to the National Press Club in which he announced the Government’s plan to frack Australia great again, the Prime Minister has announced the location of the countries first full scale frack, Engadine Maccas. “My Government is committed… Read More ›
‘Experience The Future Now’: Desperate Tourism Australia Tries New Slogan
Since Tourism Australia had to pull its ad claiming this place is heaps better than the UK, seeing as “everything’s on fire” is something the UK has so far only managed metaphorically, our tourism chiefs have been scratching their heads… Read More ›