One Nation’s leading mind (sic) Malcolm Roberts has today demanded the Government immediately hold a Royal Commission into whether or not the fridge light stays on when the door is closed.
“It’s time this Government focused on issues that matter to this country like the fridge door light situation,” said the One Nation Senator. “I have conducted extensive research into this area over the years and am yet to come up with a definitive answer.”
“I did come close one time. I managed to get myself inside a fridge however before I could close the door, security staff came by and asked me to leave Harvey Norman.”
When asked why a country like Australia that is currently facing major issues like the drought should waste resources on a a Royal Commission into whether or not the light goes off when a fridge door closes the Senator replied: “Do you have any empirical evidence that a drought is occurring?”
“And don’t give me any of that Bureau of Meteorology crap we all know they’ve been in cahoots with Colonel Sanders and Bullwinkle the Moose to fudge the numbers. Hang on, maybe this fridge light situation is a designed to distract me from my other investigations.”
“Quick grab my tin foil hat, we have to get back to my lab before they find us.”
The Prime Minister when reached for comment on Senator Roberts latest demand simply replied: “That’s nice.”
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