Cricket Australia chief Kevin Roberts flagged a flurry of new rules for cricket in reaction to the COVID-19 crisis that has hit the sport. Roberts has suggested practices such as using spit to shine a ball need to be replaced… Read More ›
COVID-19
Aussies Earning Under $100K Ordered To Download Government Tracking App
Australians with a pre-tax income of less than $100k per year have been ordered by the Government to download the Covid-19 tracking app. ”It is important that we get the economy going again and to do that we will need… Read More ›
Introvert Struggling To Find Excuses To Avoid Yet Another Video Call
A frustrated local introvert is wracking their brain for any excuse to avoid yet another video call request. The requests seem to come dozens of times each day, as energy draining extroverts seek any excuse to break the boredom of… Read More ›
Manspreading Compulsory Under New Social Distancing Law
The government has introduced a new $10,000 fine for passengers who don’t manspread on buses and trains in a bid to slow down the transmission of the coronavirus. “Any person who sits down on public transport and doesn’t whack their… Read More ›
Musician In Critical Condition After Playing Recorder To Entertain Neighbours
A recorder player is fighting for his life in intensive care after attempting to entertain the fellow residents of his block of flats with an impromptu concert from his balcony. “Barry had seen those YouTube videos from overseas of opera… Read More ›
Opinion: Covid-19 Threatens Our Wet Dreams
The other night I woke from a nightmare. In the nightmare I was home with Vicki and the kids, I turned to Vicki and told her that I was just going up to the pub for a nightcap. Vicki smiled… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 