Australians with a pre-tax income of less than $100k per year have been ordered by the Government to download the Covid-19 tracking app.
”It is important that we get the economy going again and to do that we will need the plebs up and about,” said a Government Spokesperson. ”So, I urge all low income workers to download the app and get out there and make Australia great again.”
”After all bank offices need to be cleaned and our billionaires need to be chauffeured.”
When asked why only those earning under $100k needed to download the app rather than all Australians, the Spokesperson said: ”In Australia the Government is always there to look after high earners. In this case if we have all those who earn under $100k tracked we can simply tell those who earn over where to avoid.”
”We imagine we will have to shut off certain areas to the public in order to keep them safe for the rich. But we that will be a few months off yet.”
“I mean we haven’t even figured out yet how to make the app able to give those who breach conditions an electric shock, but Pete and the boys are working on it.”
Mark Williamson
@MWChatShow
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