Malcolm Turnbull is looking forward to playing lots of tricks on apprentice members of parliament during their first day on the job after taking a slight lead in the polls. “I can’t wait to send one of the new guys… Read More ›
Election
Planning Underway For The Inaugural Scott Morrison Pride March
Planning is underway for the inaugural Scott Morrison Pride March. The event will be held on July 3 to honour and acknowledge the difficulties Mr Morrison has faced as a rich white Christian male who opposes same-sex marriage and treating asylum seekers with… Read More ›
Voters Discover They Can Direct Their Own Preferences
The entire first month of the election campaign has been revealed to be a total waste of time after Australian voters found out that they can choose for themselves where to direct their preferences. “You mean all this bollocks about… Read More ›
Election Day Cake Stalls Banned Due To Nut Allergies
The Australian Electoral Commission has announced today that no election day cake stalls will be allowed this year due to the threat posed to voters with nut allergies. A spokesperson for the AEC said: “People should be allowed to vote without being… Read More ›
Government To Establish Working Group To Explore Privatising Bob Hawke
The Coalition has announced plans to establish a working party to investigate the benefits the country would receive from privatising former Prime Minister Bob Hawke. Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull told The (un)Australian: “Just because we are establishing a working group to look… Read More ›
Environment Minister Greg Hunt To Make UFC Debut Against Brock Lesnar
Australia’s Environment Minister Greg Hunt has today announced he will be taking leave from election campaigning to enter the UFC to fight returning champion Brock Lesnar in a no-holds barred cage match. The move took the MMA world by surprise,… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 