Minister for Immigration and the bookies favourite to play the role of Mr Potatohead in a live action movie based on the famous toy Peter Dutton, has today condemned a team of firefighters for putting out a house fire in… Read More ›
Malcolm Turnbull
Australians Excited Over Rare Opportunity To Elect Their Leader
Australians across the nation have expressed excitement upon discovering that they may be able to have a say in electing the leader of their country. While on paper the country is described as a democracy, most of Australia’s modern leaders… Read More ›
Governor-General Continually Boiling The Kettle In Anticipation Of PM’s Arrival
The Governor-General Peter Cosgrove has had a frustrating week of continually boiling the kettle as he awaits the arrival of Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull, who is due to call on him in order to set the federal election date as July . A… Read More ›
Leicester City At 5000 To 1 To Win Australian Election
Bookmakers have given English Premier League champions Leicester City a 5000 to 1 chance of winning the upcoming Australian election. “If elected our defence promises to stop the boats in the same way we’ve stopped Manchester United and Chelsea from… Read More ›
Reserve Bank Insists Interest Rate Cut On Budget Night “Just A Coincidence”
The Reserve Bank of Australian has fended off suggestions that their decision to cut interest rates, and Scott Morrison handing down his first budget, on the same afternoon, are in any way related. The RBA has instead insisted that the decision… Read More ›
Turnbull Warns Bleeding Hearts Not To Get “Misty-Eyed” Over Human Rights Violations
Following a ruling by the PNG Supreme Court declaring Australia’s detention centres illegal, Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull has warned Australians not to get “misty-eyed” over the victims of its human rights abuses. A bi-partisan, 20 year campaign waged by Australia’s… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 