Australia’s 26 million people have spent the morning trying to get the image of Rupert Murdoch’s wedding night out of their head. “I’m trying to think of nice things like a beautiful lake with ducks floating on it but it’s… Read More ›
News
Vegans Call For A Ban On The Bunnings Sausage Sizzle
Australia’s Vegans have launched a petition to ban the Bunnings sausage sizzle, claiming the smell of burning flesh combined with the phallic shape of the sausage is off putting and offensive to the community at large. ”It’s time that Bunnings… Read More ›
Sky News Encourages Their Viewers, All 6 Of Them, To Get Behind Dutton
Low rating news channel, Sky News Australia, has put out the rally cry for their viewers, all 6 of them, to get behind low-polling Opposition leader, the Dark Lord Peter Dutton. ”We need our viewers to muck in and get… Read More ›
Australia’s Gas Shortage To Be Solved By Mining Sky News After Dark Crew
The Albanese Government has come up with the novel solution of solving Australia’s gas shortage by selling the mining rights to niche news network Sky News After Dark ”The gas reserves coming out of Paul Murray’s show alone is enough… Read More ›
B2 Calls B1 A Scab After The Banana Refuses To Join The ABC Strike
A fight has broken out at the ABC’s Ultimo headquarters after the popular Bananas in Pajamas duo had a disagreement over the upcoming strike, with sources saying B2 called B1 a scab. ”It was really awkward and quite heated, one… Read More ›
Entire Nation Trying Not To Picture Rupert Murdoch And Jerry Hall Doing It
Australia’s 23 million people have spent the past few days trying to get the image of Rupert Murdoch and Jerry Hall’s wedding night out of their head. “I’m trying to think of nice things like a beautiful lake with ducks… Read More ›