The spectacular re-emergence of Pizza Shapes has put new wind into the sails of Tony Abbott as he contemplates his own potential return to the top of Australian politics.
“Everyone thought we’d seen the last of the humble Pizza Shapes when they changed the recipe but the other biscuits sent in to replace them have been a total joke,” said the former Prime Minister from his perch high up in the back benches of parliament. “If a savoury biscuit can make a big comeback then there’s still hope for an unsavoury politician like myself.”
“The original recipe for Pizza Shapes contained a bit too much raw onion but hopefully this time around they’ll be a bit more palatable,” said limited News columnist and biscuit fancier Andrew Bolt. “The last time the Australian public went to the biscuit tin the choice was between a Milk Arrowroot and a Shortbread Cream. Let’s face it, has anyone ever eaten their way through a whole packet of Milk Arrowroots in one late night sitting?”
Opposition leader Bill Shorten welcomed the reappearance of Pizza Shapes, saying the public will soon remember the awful taste they leave in your mouth.
“Tony Abbott has a lot in common with Pizza Shapes. A little bit salty and you wouldn’t want to find residue of it strewn through your bed sheets.”
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