In a poll conducted by The (un)Australian it was found that 92% of all office workers believe that the weekend wasn’t long enough, Sydney housing prices are too high and that it was probably Craig from accounts that stole Julie from shipping’s yoghurt from the fridge.
When asked about the results office worker Billy Ballpointpen said: “So true that the weekend’s not long enough, I mean you blink and you miss it? And how about this weather it’s all over the shop? Did you watch the game on the weeknd?”
When pressed on whether he would support the Green’s proposal for a 4 day work week Billy replied: “Oh Mate don’t get me started on politics I could go all day. Did you hear about what happened to Julie from Shipping’s yoghurt? Someone nicked it. You didn’t hear it from me but I’m pretty sure it was Craig from accounts.”
When Minister for Employment Michaelia Cash was shown the polling she replied: “That’s an eye opener and I promise you that this Government will act to ensure thet no one’s yoghurt is ever stolen from the fridge again.”
Craig from Accounts could not be reached for comment on his alleged yoghurt theft as the last Monday of the month is his rostered day off.