Australia’s Defamation Lawyers Mourn Alan Jones’ Retirement


Australia’s defamation lawyers have all paused today for a minutes silence to pay tribute to retiring shock jock Alan Jones.

”It’s a very sad day for the defamation industry in Australia with the loss of the Alan Jones radio show,” said an Industry Spokesperson. ”I mean sure he’ll still be on Sky News but let’s be honest no one actually watches that channel.”

”With Alan retiring the legal system will be a lot poorer for it.”

When asked how lucrative Alan Jones was to the defamation industry, the Spokesperson said: ”Without Alan a lot of our lawyers would have had to settle for domestic ski holidays instead of heading overseas to Japan or Aspen in a good year.”

”Alan’s speak first and settle later approach to broadcasting is one we may never see again.”

”However, there is a glimmer of hope with young Ray Hadley still kicking around.”

Mark Williamson

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