Column: Pete Evans’ Guide To Cooking Up A Conspiracy Theory

evans

When theunaustralian.net contacted me about being a columnist for their site, I was a little skeptical. Then the cheque cleared and suddenly, my skepticism was gone!

Today I am going to talk you through how to cook up one of my favourite things – a conspiracy theory.

All you will need is a half-baked idea and in excess of 40,000 units of social media followers.

The first step is to take your half-baked idea and scramble it a bit, maybe add a dash of Bill Gates and 5 grams – or should I say 5G – worth of pixie dust.

The next step is to spread your idea liberally throughout social media. A YouTube post here, a blog there, and finish with a podcast appearance or two to garnish.

Now, don’t worry if your first conspiracy theory doesn’t rise; it can take a while to get things right.

If at first you don’t succeed, then be sure to blame the Government or the Illuminati.

Join me next week, when I will tell you how to cook up some revenge to be served to former colleagues. This dish is best served cold and will have a definite French feel to it.

Pete Evans

You can follow The (un)Australian on twitter @TheUnOz or like us on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/theunoz.

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Categories: Opinion

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