ScoMo Happy To Leave The Court With His Pants Not On Fire

Former Australian Prime Minister (yep, really), Scott Morrison, has left court after testifying in the Linda Reynolds defamation case, telling friends that he’s relieved to get out of there with his pants not on fire.

”Never good to be in court, especially as you know that I don’t hold much truck with lawyers,” said Scotty from Engadine. ”But, I was there for poor Linda, we fought the law and I think we won.”

”That’s a catchy tune you know, where have I heard it before.”

When asked why he would join sides with Linda Reynolds in trying to bankrupt a pregnant rape victim, Scotty from Engadine said: ”Well, it’s democracy manifest, isn’t it?”

”Besides, not only is Linda a victim in this situation, so am I.”

”Where’s my succulent Chinese meal, I don’t know judo.”

”Now, if you’ll excuse me, it’s been a long day, I need to go home and have Jen explain it all to me.

Mark Williamson

@MWChatShow

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