The UnOz’s Person of the Year award is one of the most anticipated events of the year, with defamation lawyers everywhere especially keen to see the list.

2025 has been a year of ups and downs, highs and lows and everything in between. We’ve had a Federal election which saw the media’s team lose. Barnaby Joyce walked out of another relationship, leaving the Nationals for One Nation.

Pauline and Barnaby together have inspired the Nation to get down on their knees, to pray that there’s no sex tape.

In the sporting World Australia’s own, Oscar Piastri, was cruelly robbed of a maiden World championship. Did his team conspire against him? Of course they did, it’s Un-Australian not to be believe that he was robbed. In happier news, Bazball finally hit Australian shores, and hasn’t it been spectacular, spectacularly bad.

Who else made 2025 a year to remember/forget, see below who we found to be naughty or nice. Spoiler alert no one was nice this year.

Linda Reynolds

A court found that Brittany Higgins was beyond the balance of probabilities raped in Linda Reynolds’ office. This year Linda devoted herself and succeeded in bankrupting Brittany Higgins.

It is no coincidence that Linda’s middle name is Karen (go on google it, we’re not making that up). We’d like to say more but our lawyers have strongly advised against doing so.

Alan Jones

Allegedly.

Peter Dutton

In a sometimes bleak and depressing year a somewhat unexpected jester emerged, Peter Dutton. Despite having the personality of a flaming diaper and the popularity of a beef wellington at a pot luck dinner, Peter thought he could win the popularity contest that is the Federal Election.

Peter failed miserably, but oh how we laughed. We laughed at Peter, we laughed at his cheer leaders in the press, like Sharri Markson who the day before the election claimed the polls were wrong and the Liberals could win. Sharri was wrong, no wonder her Sky News show is only watched by 6 of her closest friends.

What’s next for Peter Dutton? Rumour has it that he’s taken a job with the RSPCA, euthanising unwanted pets. Friends say he has never been happier.

JD Vance

It’s hard work being the back up to one of the most talked about and powerful men in the World, but JD Vance has really stood up and shined as Donald Trump’s number 2. In fact when people think about number 2 JD Vance’s is whom they picture.

Erin Patterson

No one has done more in the last few years to raise the awareness of mushrooms or beef wellingtons. What’s next for Erin? An appearance on Celebrity Masterchef, in 30 to 35 years time.

Tony Abbott

Some former politicians drift off into retirement and are seldom heard from, not so Tony. He has spent the year, when not meddling in Liberal party matters, writing a book about Australian history.

Not surprisingly the whole thing is written in white ink.

Jeffrey Epstein

Despite being dead for over 7 years, Jeffrey Epstein just keeps on hanging around.

The Brisbane Lions

Winning their second AFL premiership in a row is a feat to be celebrated. Not at the offices of the UnOz, where 50% of the writers are Geelong Cats fans.

*If you disagree with our list of nominees, then leave a comment below with your nomination.

On behalf of Team UnOz, thank you for visiting the site and have a great festive season and we will be back in early January with the all the best news, analysis and slander.

Thanks for reading.

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Categories: Opinion

Tags: 2025, AFL, Alan Jones, Allegedly, auspol, Brisbane Lions, Erin Patterson, Geelong Cats, Historey, Insiders, Jeffrey Epstien, jokes, Linda REynolds, Oscar PIastri, Person of the year, Peter Dutton, satire, Time Magazine, Tony Abbott, Year In Review