Minister for the dark arts Peter Dutton has spoken of his surprise after finding a million dollar Townsville property down the back of the couch. Promising that he will list the property on the parliamentary register next time that… Read More ›
Au Pair
“I Won’t Be Making That Mistake Again” Vows Dutton As Australia Is Swamped By Boatloads Of Au Pairs
Peter Dutton has vowed to never again show any signs of humanity after his last slip up led to Australia being overrun by boatloads of empowered au pairs. “Our streets are infested with dreadlock haired German hippie girls taking babies… Read More ›
Dutton Announces The Death Penalty For Anyone Who Tampers With A Potato
Following the recent spate of needles being found in strawberries and other assorted fruits the Minister for the Home Affairs Peter Dutton has announced as a preventative measure that anyone caught tampering with a potato will be put to death…. Read More ›
Shorten Refuses Dutton’s Request For A Parliamentary Au Pair
Opposition leader Bill Shorten has declined to offer Minister for Home Affairs Peter Dutton a parliamentary au pair so that the Minister would be able to miss this week’s sitting of parliament. “Usually it is a formality that the Opposition… Read More ›
Au Pairs, Polo And Tax Cuts For Big Business; Morrison Launches Liberals Election Campaign
Australian Prime Minister for this week Scott Morrison has unofficially launched his parties upcoming election campaign. Promising a country built around au pairs, polo and tax cuts for big business. “I promise that any Government I lead will always be… Read More ›
Dutton Accused Of Visa Cheating After Being Caught With Au Pairs In His Pocket
The Minister for Immigration and aspiring Bond villain Peter Dutton has denied claims he cheated. Despite being caught on camera adjusting a visa with an au pair that he pulled out of his pocket. “This is 100% fake news. Those… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 