Former Minister for Women Tony Abbott has spoken of his wish that incarcerated Cardinal George Pell will soon be free to enter the world and touch others as he has done so in the past. “I don’t wish to say… Read More ›
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Abbott Asks Wife To Bake Him A Cake Big Enough To Hide A Hacksaw
Former Minister for Women Tony Abbott has told friends of how he asked his wife Margie to bake him a cake big enough to conceal a hacksaw so that he could surprise his dear friend and confidant George Pell with… Read More ›
Aus Open To Change Scoring System To Appease Margaret Court Replacing Love With Hate
The Australian Open tennis tournament has announced that next year to celebrate the 50th anniversary of Margaret Court’s historic Grand Slam they will amend the scoring system used in matches by replacing love with hate. “We have to acknowledge Margaret’s… Read More ›
Cabinet To All Pitch In And Buy Matthias ‘Numbers Man’ Cormann A Calculator For Christmas
With the end of the parliamentary year in sight Scott Morrison’s cabinet have done a whip around with everybody chipping in to buy Senate Leader Matthias ‘Numbers Man’ Cormann a calculator for Christmas. “In an ideal world we would have… Read More ›
Frydenburg Promises To Flog Westpac With The Warmest Of Lettuce
Treasurer Josh Frydenburg has told colleagues of his plans to punish rogue bank Westpac by flogging the bank and it’s executives with the warmest lettuce he can find. “Josh is very upset at Westpac right now,” said a Government Insider…. Read More ›
Australian Farmers Urged To Give Generously To Struggling Banking Executives
Australia’s farmers currently dealing with bush fires and drought have been urged to put their hands in their pockets to give what they can to Australia’s struggling banking executives. “Our poor banking executives are really doing it tough,” said an… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 