The Dark Lord Peter Dutton has emerged from his secret lair to condemn Sudanese Tradies over the ongoing riots in Melbourne. ”It is appalling that theses people are rioting in Melbourne at the moment,” said the Dark Lord. ”I have… Read More ›
Defence
Dutton Prepares For Move To Defence By Googling ‘Military Coup’
The Government’s current Minister for the dark arts Peter Dutton has been busily researching his rumoured new Ministry, that of defence by learning all he can about ‘Military coups.’ “I’ve always prided myself on being across my brief,” said the… Read More ›
Scomo Spends $270 Billion To Fortify Defence Of Eden-Monaro
The Prime Minister has announced a $270 billion dollar spending spree on the defence of Eden-Monaro against an unnamed enemy, hinted at as a regional political party linked to the interests of the union movement and the advancement of the… Read More ›
Christopher Pyne Denies Any Conflicts Over New Role As Fixer For Ernst And Young
Recently retired federal minister Christopher Pyne has denied there is any conflict of interest in his taking on a new role as a consultant to Ernst and Young in the fixing industry. “Yes I was a fixer for the government… Read More ›
Defence White Paper Names Giant Squid As Australia’s Greatest Security Threat
Australia will be spending upwards of $150 billion on twelve new submarines after yesterday’s defence white paper asserted that giant squid remain the nation’s greatest enemy. “No-one need fear being taken from the deck of a ship by a giant… Read More ›
Jacqui Lambie To Meet With Political Psychopath
Newly Independent Senator Jacqui Lambie is to take a meeting with a political psychopath, or as he is also known, the Prime Minister Tony Abbott, following her recent split from the Palmer United Party (PUP). Senator Lambie is tipped to… Read More ›